4.12.2006

Repent now! The end (of literature) is near!

My first thought: kill me now.
My second thought: there is still a good market for ghostwriters.
My third thought: kill me now.

8 comments:

cj said...

What took so long? A celebrity without a novel is like a Disney movie without merchandising tie-ins. After all, if you don't "write" a novel, you haven't thoroughly milked the cash cow of fame!

Toad Press said...

Did you also notice her crown is at least three times to big for her head?

SER said...

Oh, come on, give her some credit - it can't be easy to muster enough energy to write a book when you're going on six calories a day!

NickAntosca said...

This is a deeply profound book. I have read it. It is about the human condition in America.

Grendel said...

2 copies at the public library, and one hold... it MUST be good.

PJKM said...

Here are the first two sentences of the book - read it and weep:

"Chloe Parker would be a terrible role model if she were famous. Trouble is that she was about to be."

Would, be, were, was, be ...

Maybe the author(s) neglected to meditate upon the text.

ian said...

Hey, I'm just impressed Nicole Richie knows how to use the subjunctive tense. I imagine that her break-up with Paris Hilton was prompted by exchanges like

PARIS: If I was poor, I'd just shoot myself.

NICOLE: Were. If you were poot.

PARIS: I wasn't poor, you silly bitch. Now go eat a hot dog or something.

the plunge said...

This book came out six months ago! Weren't any of you there at the release party? There was so much free coke it was ridiculous. Then Nicole did a reading an I'm telling you, it was friggin non-parellel. She actually sat there and read THE WHOLE BOOK! And the audience was enrapt! It changed my life.